Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
