I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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