Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
