I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
