i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
