Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
