And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I want to be your penis for a week.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
