If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
