She said her name was "party"
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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