Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
it glows. i had to have it.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
