Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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