So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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