Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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