But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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