last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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