so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize