he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
