I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize