think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Damn victory sex feels great
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
