i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
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