I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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