I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
