Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
