PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize