Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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