Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
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It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
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Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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