I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
