wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.