I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize