forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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