Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
