We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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