I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
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