So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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