Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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