So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
