Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I will be naked everywhere
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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