Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
