This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
