Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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