maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Randomize
