dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
