At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
