Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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