I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize