I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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