Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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