Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
