You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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