You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
