Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
it glows. i had to have it.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
is it fun? or sober?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
